Temptation and Wilderness

Lectionary Readings: Deuteronomy 26:1-11; Psalm 91:1-2, 9-16; Romans 10:8b-13; and Luke 4:1-13

Today's readings remind us of what Lent is. As Jesus went into the wilderness to be closer to God, he was tempted by the devil. As humans, we are no doubt tempted, though this temptation becomes more obvious and clear when it is in the form of chocolate, which one has given up for Lent, or a favorite snack glaring at us. But in a much more serious sense, we have a very unique type of "temptation" as LGBTQ Christians. The devil chided Jesus in Luke's readings "If you are the Son of God [insert temptation]." Similarly, we find ourselves mocked in a similar way; "If you are gay, then how can you be Christian?" or "If you are Christian, how can you be gay?" For many of us, we spend far more than 40 days in a wilderness of sorts as we try to fuse the two worlds together, or even trying to accept our sexuality in the face of societal or religious hostility. Just as the Holy Spirit was with Jesus during his journey in the wilderness, so to is the Spirit with us as we navigate our lives as Christians but also as queer persons. It isn't always easy and sometimes, we may feel like giving in and giving up one identity in order to accommodate others tempting us to pick one or the other. Sometimes, it may seem as though it would be easier to forgo one for the other. Yet, as Christians, God anointed us with our sexuality. By being made different, we are called to something special, much like the people of Deuteronomy. The Lord tells Her people to forget not their past, for it is part of their calling. Yet, for many of us, that past is traumatizing, filled with denial and lies. Still, as God didn't want the people of Israel to forget their past, so to does She not want us to forget ours. There will be times in our future where we must call upon our past to give light to the present.
When read in its original Greek, the Holy Spirit didn't just move Christ to the wilderness, the Holy Spirit yearned that Christ come into the wilderness. He was beckoned there after being baptized, anointed in his mission. In what ways are we, as LGBTQ Christians called into a strange and sometimes hostile wildernesses. But the Psalm for today comforts us who are called to that wilderness. We are reminded that God has commanded that an angel protect us "in our ways." How comforting to know that in all of our struggles, we are sent an angel to help us, to lift us up, to protect us from evil.
As we continue this lenten season, let us remember that as we journey through the wilderness, God has sent an angel to be with us and protect us in our journey.

Ash Wednesday and Lent

I used to hate getting ashes on my forehead as a kid in a Catholic school. I somehow always ended up with the most deformed and messed up smear of soot on my forehead, at least I thought I did. Now it has become something to which I look forward. Lent is a time of turning back to the Lord. The ashes symbolize the beginning of that journey. No longer am I concerned about my ashes looking strange nor do I rush to the bathroom after the service to fix my hair to cover the ashes. Part of this may be because the only time I have to get my ashes is in the evening so very few people actually see them. But the bigger reason, I think, is that when I finally came out of the closet and accepted my sexuality as a gift from God, I stopped caring so much about other people's judgements. Why I thought that the other kids in my school, who also had ashes, would judge my ashes, I do not know. But the judgement about my sexuality was something very real for me. It prevented me from having a relationship with Christ. Coming out of the closet is so much like Ash Wednesday in my mind. It marked the beginning of my turning back to the Lord, a journey often filled with bumps and turmoil, but a journey still filled with joy.
For many Christians, Lent is a 40 day endurance test of who can make it all the way to Easter Sunday without something so wonderful, like chocolate or a favorite tv show. In many ways, this is the wrong approach to Lent. Lent is a time in which we give up that which hinders a true and authentic relationship with God. This Lent, I challenge the LGBTQ community and its allies to give up any shame associated with our sexual orientations or gender identities. Use this opportunity to reflect deeper on what is means to live out the persons God made us to be.